Hi, my name is Nyghtmist and I am a stupid fucking idiot.
What is the definition of stupidity, ladies and gents? Doing the same thing again and again and expecting different results.
Just wanted to have that out there.
Recall that my grandma is here visiting. Recall also that my grandma, like my parents, likes to go to the casino to gamble.
My grandma is on a fixed income. Apparently that income has gone for this month. Her bills are all paid, at least, so to be without money is an annoyance, but not a major one.
Or so I thought.
For a bit of background before we get to the meat, my parents are on vacation now. They have “no money” for entertainment this week so they are mad, but they never have money on their vacations so I don’t know why they’re surprised.
To the meat: my parents and grandma went to the casino last night and stayed there until about 2 in the morning. They went again this morning with some money the Lord of Lassitude had (he wanted to see if they could win him some more money). I guess they lost that money, because they were all back in an hour or so, looking and feeling sad.
About 20 minutes ago, I get a knock on my bedroom door (I’ve been staying away just so I don’t have to feel the low-level craving for the casino that they all have swirling inside them–if you’ve ever been around anyone with an addiction, you know what that feels like).
I know who’s at my door, and I have a really good idea of what they want.
Sure enough, it’s Volcano. He says, “We have a really big favor to ask you.” He’s using the voice he uses when he asks for favors, so yeah, it’s pretty big.
I’m tempted to ask, “How much?” before he even asks, because I know he–they, the three of them–want money to feed the demon. But I stay quiet; there’s a possibility–a tiny, tiny, small possibility–that I’m wrong.
“Your grandma wants to borrow 200 dollars.”
My eyebrows shoot up at this and I think, If *she* wants to borrow the money, why are *you* in my face asking for it?
I guess I’m quiet too long because Volcano says, “She says she’ll give it back to you as soon as she gets her money next week.”
“Why does she need 200 dollars?” I ask. I know why, but damn it, I want him to tell me. I want him to say it to my face.
He closes up, and now I get the anger lashed out at me. “I don’t have to tell you that. We’re your parents, and we don’t have to tell you why. Will you loan us the money or not?”
I go downstairs, and my grandma and the Keeper of the Holograms are sitting on the couch, looking up expectantly.
“So, you guys want this money so you can go to the casino to spend it, huh?” I say. My voice is dripping acid.
KotH says, “See, this is why I didn’t want to ask her. I knew she’d give me this attitude. I wanted to go borrow it from [a payday loan place] but your dad said to ask you.”
My grandma says, “I promise to give it right back to you.” She keeps saying it. I feel sorry for her. She’s the reason I cave (damn fucking idiot, see?) and say, “Well, come on, somebody take me to the bank so I can get this over with.”
I assure my grandma that I believe her.
Volcano takes me to the bank, and on the way there he says, “You shouldn’t be that way. She said she’d give it back to you. She won’t take your money.”
“The money is not the point,” I say.
“You shouldn’t have come downstairs and said that about the casino.”
“Why not? It’s what you all want the money for, right?”
“But you knew already. Why’d you ask?” Volcano says.
“Because I might have been wrong. You could have wanted the money for a new fridge (which is on its last legs, fyi, Constant Reader).”
Volcano is miffed at that. “When we need money for a new fridge, we won’t ask you. Not for that (his emphasis).”
I roll my eyes, and he continues, “Besides we’re family and you shouldn’t be that way with family.”
“I don’t have the right to ask why you want my money?”
“Your grandma wants it,” he says.
“But you were the one up there asking me for it, not her. All of you will go there and spend it. I already know that. But you’re mad at me because I want to know what you want it for? Every other time you want to borrow money from me, you say why, but not this time.”
“You knew already,” Volcano says. “If you knew already there’s no reason to tell you.”
“Whatever,” I say, totally annoyed now–with myself and the situation.
“You shouldn’t act this way,” Volcano says, returning to his old refrain. “We’re family. You should want to help your family.”
Somebody please come over and slap me. Please? Or kill me maybe, so this won’t keep happening.